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On a foggy morning, as the sun's gaze fell on this part of planet earth, I opened my eyes- from a nasty dream. I shivered- droplets of mist, all over me and fear deep inside my heart. The fear, that would accompany me till my grave! The fear - am sure is not unknown to mothers like me. I wake up each morning, ignoring my ill health, the cold weather, the urge to sleep- with a prayer on my lips- my children….. My pretty daughters……All asleep, blissfully unaware of the cruel world they live in.

Nothing makes me happy than the sight of them smiling at me, all in unison, all in glee…. I forget all my worries and smile with them, play with them. My children, my treasure, my world, my all….. I wished for them all prosperity, all happiness, all the luck they could ask for…. and a long life. They had dreams-fly like a kite, sing like a nightingale, dance in the rain…. I would lie awake, just to listen to them whispering to the stars and the moon. I saw them smiling….spreading their arms, embracing the wind and getting lost in their own world. 

It was just another day and I woke up, daring the cold weather and I smiled on seeing my sleeping beauties. They woke up- one by one and we all geared up for a cheerful day. What started as a mild breeze, gathered speed and we were all swinging in the arms of the gust- unaware of the gaze that fell on us- a dark cloud, set to spell our doom.  Our eyes met- I saw the man approaching us. He had the eyes of a hawk. He kept on staring at my children and I cringed as his palm caressed their soft cheeks. I saw the fear in my children’s eyes and the pain on having been touched with a palm that carried all the harshness of the world.  I screamed, asked him to back off. He smiled at me and touched the youngest of my kids- crushed her. I passed out before I saw her lifeless body hit the soil. One by one their petals fell.....

The agony of being a helpless mother, of seeing the worst of your nightmare come true, of waking up to see your kids- no more. I saw them get killed for the pleasures of a monster. I am alive and breathing- I live to tell the world the story of a helpless mother and of daughters, trampled  before bloom....

                                                                       

Joy to the world......

"Joy to the world! the Lord is come; 

 Let earth receive her King; 

 Let every heart prepare him room, 

     And heaven and nature sing,    

   And heaven and nature sing, 

     And heaven, and heaven, and nature sing...."

Carols...they've got a peculiar charm that adds to the nostalgia... The song that fades in and out in the cold December nights...In the land of latex, letters, spices and achayans….the spirit of Christmas is hard to miss!! The mild drop in temperature, fog that filters through the rubber trees, the vibrant cakes that sits atop the glass shelves of the bakeries, the paper made stars that lit up homes- it’s Christmas in the air. Temporary stalls selling Christmas tree/crib decoratives, greeting cards, crackers etc pops up everywhere-where all our pocket money vaporizes. We used to decorate school buses with color papers, balls, paper stars of all shades, bells, and what not!! There was a silent competition among the commuters of each route- to showcase their bus- the best... Before all the niceties of Christmas, there stood a hurdle- the terminal exams, aka Christmas pareeksha!! From the day the time table gets announced, it’s a wait-a wait to get out of the clutches of the exam monster and leap into the holiday season. A day after the exams comes the Christmas celebrations at school - secret santa and other games, house-wise carol/ x-mas tree competitions and that very evening on the way home, we would unceremoniously bare our school buses off all the sheen and glamour. Freedom from books, flurry of cakes, crackers, greetings...a lot of tv, a lot of sleep, lot of games…  

At home, we had an ivory wood tree, which we christened-our Christmas tree. Mornings, we would rush to the tree to check the damage the mist has done to the paper decoratives, and wait for the sun to tend to those-hurt. We kept on burdening the tree with all colorful things that came our way, till the end of Christmas season. Strains of drum beats in the middle of the night- the carol gang doing rounds- “Shaanta raatri, thiruraathri…” the Santa dancing to the song in the light of petromax lamps. The glee on seeing the carol singers and the sorrow that creeps into the heart on seeing them leave- taking away with them the joy of Christmas….It was sad to see the paper stars and trees disappearing....The joy of Christmas leaves your heart, with a promise to return, a promise as sweet as the Christmas cake....as bright as a lit star.... Sing with me, my fav carol……. 

 “Dashing through the snow In a one-horse open sleigh 

 O'er the fields we go Laughing all the way 

Bells on bobtail ring' Making spirits bright 

What fun it is to ride and sing A sleighing song tonight! 

Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way. 

Oh! what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh. 

Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way; 

Oh! what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh “ 

Merry Christmas, all…………….

Tale of a tiger balm!!

Couple of days back, as I opened my window pane, I found an empty bottle of tiger balm- on the sill. Every time I see a bottle of tiger balm, I get reminded of my maternal grandfather. Sounds strange huh? Its not that he had a constant head ache that kept him attached to the balm or so. I was his first grandchild and he never got a chance to pamper any other grandchild other than me before he left for the heavenly abode. I had the privilege of disturbing him/ commanding him to do tasks that would delight me. He was more of a buddy to me and I did take advantage of the freedom he gave me. My visits to my mother's house were limited and he used to wait eagerly for each of our stopovers. I was his little princess and much to my moms envy, I took over the coveted place of his darling. He used to tell me a lot of stories. I would wait till he completes one tale so that I could ask him to start the next. On one such occasion, he got tired with story telling. And it was my turn to nag him, asking for more stories. He was too tired to tell me another and so he faked head ache. A two year old granddaughter who had deep affection for her grandpa wanted to soothe him from the pain. The solution- she found a tiger balm and to begin with – she applied it on his forehead, then on his face as a whole. Little did she know that headaches are restricted only to the forehead, and so she applied it all over his body- emptying the bottle. Great love for her grandpa- u know!!! Unaware of those tiny hands spreading love in the form of tiger balm-all over his body, grandpa was fast asleep. Balm set on its work n forced my grandpa to wake up to a pain- known only to him. He yelled on top of his voice- bringing everyone at his reach. For a while no one realized what happened. All they found was a bottle of tiger balm lying all alone and of course-the strong smell of it. And the culprit!!! She was not in the vicinity. And the poor grandpa, though the pain didn't let him laugh at the joke his granddaughter played on him- took the matter light. To cool his burning body all he could do was plunge into the river behind the house. The granddaughter- gets taunted by her mother every time a bottle of tiger balm comes into picture…..

Love of my life....

A lazy Sunday…a lazy me, staring at the flashing images on the TV screen, a lazy fan running at the minimum speed cos of the lazy weather. Phone bell ringing…A male voice on the other side…. We spoke….We kept on talking…. Talking talking…. Until we met, a month later…
Did sparks fly???Did I hear bells chiming???
Our eyes met… we smiled…we greeted…and we spent a whole day with each other, tea n lunch n window shopping… and by the time he left, I wished the day was still young, wished I could spent some more time with him. As my phone rang and I saw his name flashing, with a fluttering heart, I spoke. We spoke for some more time and I realized, he too was hoping for the things that I hoped for “that the day was still young and if we could spend some more time together.” I couldn’t stop smiling as he invited me to spend the rest of my life with him. We giggled a lot….. and wished in unison, “we could have done this in person” :). So, on the 14th of Jan, Sanju & Devi meets for the first time and they fall in love with each other and decide to spent the rest of their lives together...to share all their joy n sorrow...to be on each others side- for ever n ever n ever...

It has been only 83 days since we met…in 83 days; he has become what nobody means to me in all these years. These 83 days has brought me more smiles, joy, memories and what not!!!It feels as though we have known each other for long, that our lives were intertwined and that we were so meant to be… Marriages, they say are definitely made in heaven.There is a heaven for sure, I know.


You meet as strangers and in no time, you become a part of each others lives, you become one…the most important person in your lives. The monotonous, otherwise aimless life suddenly becomes otherwise. You have someone to talk to, someone to listen to, a shoulder to lean, someone to share all your joy, fears and silly talks…. A pair of eyes where you see only you, a heart that beats for you, a mind that thinks of you… Suddenly you have just the two of you in your lives and you just cannot stop thinking of each other.

As my eyes darted, for the nth time on my phone, eagerly awaiting a message or a call…. I smiled…where were you all this while….. what took us this long to meet!!! Everything has its own time, I suppose….. n ours has started… ever since the day we met. I know it’s a long wait till August- 134 days to go!!! The distance and the time, we’ll dare it all… for, we are so meant to be…

I have you....

27 years of waiting …. a long one indeed….
27 years of prayers…. to all gods I know….
27 years of love….. all that my heart could contain…
Now that I have you by my side,
I can only smile……
can only thank heavens…
Pour out all that love to you…
Be with you, for the rest of our lives...